Blogger of the Year... NOT.

My friend Shanna nominated me for a blogging award! I think it’s Laziest Blogger of the Year, but whatever, I’ll take it.

Being nominated for this award also brings with it serious responsibilities… I’m supposed to share 7 things about myself! So here goes:

1) I love the smell of dead skunk.

2) I love.love.LOVE baby drool. Maybe I should clarify. I love.love.love. MY baby’s drool. There is nothing better than a huge, wet, wide open kiss from Landry. It’s the bestest.

3) I.AM.NOT.AN.ATHLETE

- My freshman year of high school I tried swimming, cross country and soccer. All three attempts to become an “athlete” ended in dramatic fashion.

- Swim Team: after all of 2 practices, the coach decided to enter me into a Swim Meet. After my first race, one of the judges told me that if I didn’t complete the turnaround in a legal fashion, I would be disqualified from the meet. Hmmm, would have been nice if someone had taught me how to do that… The only other thing I remember is that all of the swimmers have to stay in the water until the last person is finished. Um yeah… I remember picking my head up out of the water and seeing ALL of the other racers at the end of their lanes looking at me pleadingly like “hurry the heck up, our fingers are turning into prunes!” Fun times.

- Cross Country: have I mentioned that my freshman year of high school was spent in Germany? On my first practice we started running on school property, but quickly ended up in a nearby German park. It didn’t take long before I was D.O.N.E. Gasping for air, clutching my chest, you get the picture. I ended up lost in the German park, not sure how to get back to the High School. The worst part of it were the old naked German men sunbathing in the park. Did I mention they were naked? And old? I somehow found my way back, without asking for directions, and needless to say, that was both my first and last attempt at Cross Country. Fun times.

- Soccer: my reasoning behind wanting to join the soccer team should have been a huge red flag that I wasn’t doing it for the right reasons. I wanted to wear the really cute, warm up outfits the team got to wear over their uniforms. The wind pants, the zip up jacket, etc. It was 1992… they were cool. After I was on the team, another red flag should have been that my favorite part of the whole experience was the snack during halftime. I didn’t even play that much, but I sure did chow down on those orange slices – yum! One of the last memories from this debacle was when I was actually in a game. I was running down the sideline, the ball was somewhere close by, and I could hear my coach yelling at me “What are you doing?!” to which I responded, while running, “I don’t know!!!”. Sidenote: since I joined the team a little late, they were out of the really cute, warm up wind suits! I was stuck with thick polyester piece of crap, snap up the side pants, and an awful matching jacket. AND at one of the matches, I left my bag in the dressing room with my shin guards and really cute shoes my parents had bought me and some awful little German stole my bag. I should have quit when I saw the polyester. Fun times.

All that being said, I did try out and make the Frankfurt American High School Drill Team! We performed at football and basketball games and even traveled to California to compete in a national drill team competition. The little uniforms we got to wear were really.really.CUTE!

4) My hubby is much more of a clean freak than I am! Surprise, surprise.

5) I am slightly obsessed (ok, a LOT obsessed) with celebrity gossip and all of the entertainment news shows. Ask me anything and I’ll be able to tell you. I know it’s a serious waste of brain space, but whatever, I have enough room in there.

6) I have an undeniable feeling that I WILL win the lottery at some point in my life. I just really.really.really.really hope I’m still young enough to enjoy it when it DOES happen. Because it’s going to happen. Hear that Universe? I WILL win the lottery. Thanks in advance.

7) I absolutely LOVE (humans excluded from list) roller coasters, bubble baths, Italian food, attending LSU football games, movies, movie popcorn, lemon gum, Llano wine, traveling, sleeping in, NAPS, Texas Hold ’em, brownies, blog stalking, Hibachi, Autumn, Ugg Boots, American Idol/ Brothers & Sisters/ Modern Family, my Kindle, Bob's Steakhouse, Target, Starbucks, Chick-Fil-A, Babe’s (not a strip joint), MooYah, colored pens, post-its, our DVR(s), candles, spooning (only with Blair), and Connect Four!!!

I absolutely HATE (humans excluded from list) any form of seafood, scary movies, rodents (only exception is Gizmo – Ireland’s hamster, but if he ever were to get loose in my house the sticky traps would come out!), canker sores, my feet touched, black licorice, bra/swimsuit/jeans shopping (most shopping in general), decorating, and bugs (even the “harmless” ones, they’re still bugs-yuck)!!!

I’m now supposed to nominate 7 other bloggers, but two of the blogs I visit often have already been chosen and the other blogs I visit/stalk are strangers… except for Angela! Ang – I know you’re busy, but you’ve been “nominated”! Congrats!

Dear Beth,

Since I'm 99.9% sure you're the only person that still checks the blog (I'm not sure why because you KNOW it hasn't been updated) and that any readers you might have had have given up on you and your blog, I wanted to tell you that you have NO excuse not to blog this weekend!!!

Landry is having his first sleepover on Saturday at Aunt Kris' house so there WILL be time to update the blog. And if it takes you forever, it's your own damn fault for not blogging in over 2 months. You suck.

Sincerely,
~the Beth that wishes/hopes/prays to become a better blogger